How to choose the right people to help me raise my kids

In this new modern world that we are living in, where we are more connected by Facebook, Instagram and other social medias I feel like I'm constantly trying to create my own village or tribe. Obviously, it starts by finding a partner in crime, then followed by tiny humans and then trying to find you're new barring as a new Mom or Dad.

The obvious go-to choice would be family. Unfortunately, not every granny is available to be a full time Nanny when comes time to go back to work or even be available to babysit once in a while. Also, you might not want your family to be caregivers for your children. Maybe you have different values now that you are all grown up or don’t want to be a burden to their already busy lives.

So what do you do?! Start observing. I found my oldest first Babysitter by playing at the park for months on end with this lovely lady. She was energetic, responsible (sitting the toddler she was minding down to eat her neatly cut up snack, for example) and very smiley and lovely. I decided to approach her. It turned out she was available for the exact few hours that I needed her. And it was a wonderful first babysitting experience.

The way I go about finding these special people is by following these few steps:

1. Observe: for a long time, if you are looking at a nursery, sit yourself in a corner for a whole day and observe. If it's for a babysitter, make sure you observe her fully for a good number of hours with your child/children.

2. Intuition: the same feeling that helped us connect to our love one. The "dating spark" people are searching for. It applies fully to finding the right caregivers. If there is no "click" keep looking.

3. Love and affection: Does it feel genuine? Do you feel at ease watching them play and engage with your child? If the answer is no, keep looking.

4. If your child is speaking already get their opinion. If they are strongly against a person, listen to them.

When all of these steps follow through and your lucky enough to find another someone with similar values, energy and approach towards life they will probably end up being a member of your tribe! Hurray! You're not alone in this. We are all looking to grow our tribes and have help with our tiny humans so lets start looking. Talk to that neighbor that seems cool and funny, approach the mommy at the park that also lets her kid eat a snack without washing hands and remember we're all in this together,

Sending you love and smiles,

Alona